Taking a Crown? I'm Fighting a Clown

by Guest February 9th 2009, 11:43 pm

Spoiler:

(((( The Call ))))

{{[[ The Cell phone begins to go insane with the Halloween music, as it rings. King Hardcore sits at the head of the dining room table starring at it, as it stops the screen reads [8 MISSED CALLS] he rubs his hand through his hair then begins to scratchy at his beard. The ring begins again, this time with King Hardcore quickly grabbing the phone, thinking about pressing that green button that would send him on a brand new journey in this insane and wacky world of professional wrestling. He slams the phone down and leans back in his chair, holding his breath for a few seconds and closing his eyes in the process. [9 MISSED CALLS] Another opportunity to torture himself in a wrestling ring passes. This time the phone is dead, lifeless, as he opens his eyes and stares. Waiting, wondering if maybe they had given up, maybe they were done with the thought of a King Hardcore return to the ring. King Hardcore smiles as he picks up the phone, until it begins to scream at him again, this time he answers quickly.]]}}

King Hardcore: Who is this?
..
King Hardcore: No Limit Wrestling Federation? Yeah, I’ve heard of it.
..
King Hardcore: No, I’m not interested in a return to wrestling, sorry you wasted your time.
..
King Hardcore: That’s more then I’ve ever made in my career, why are you doing this?
..
King Hardcore: Ok, I’ll sign. But I have a few conditions we have to discuss when I get there.
..
{{[[ King Hardcore slides the phone away and smiles. ]]}}

(((( Fighting a Clown ))))

{{[[ King Hardcore stands at the top of a hill, it is very late at night and the moon is high in the sky. As he begins to walk, the camera backs up to reveal that this is a graveyard and King Hardcore is standing next to an dug up grave with a shovel. ]]}}

King Hardcore: You see Chuck Matthews while you criticize my career you fail to realize I’m not doing this for pride, glory, or championship titles. The reason I do this, and the reason I signed with the NLWF is because I love to put little fucks like you in there place, and let them know who the real fucking deal is.

{{[[ King Hardcore drops the shovel into the pile of dirt next to him. He looks down into the hold at the casket and nods in approval. ]]}}

King Hardcore: I have had a very proud career, in which I spent most of my time dominating the TEWF, Total Extreme Wrestling Federation. Chuck Matthews you remind me of a man known as Bobby Ocean. You see Bobby Ocean did whatever it took to try to beat me. He stole segments, bribed people, and made my life slightly boring, but you know what the common factor you two have? You both can’t beat me! Am I honestly supposed to be impressed with your 2 and 0 record? You beat up a couple of jobbers, one in match you weren’t scheduled to be in, and the other against a guy who didn’t even seem to know how to wrestle.

{{[[ King Hardcore claps. ]]}}

King Hardcore: Bravo, Chuck Matthews! But I have some bad news for you, I’m not a jobber. Surprise, I’m a fucking wizard of hardcore and ultra-violence matches! Disfiguring your face and body will only make me happy, it will be like smoking a cigarette after sex, or eating a big fat hamburger right after you are released from prison. It will be so awesome to make you bleed, to see you beg for another day of life! To watch you beg to die another day.

{{[[ King Hardcore reaches down into the grave and opens up the casket, inside is his TEWF Championship belt, a Barbwire Baseball Bat, and several other items of hardcore nature. ]]}}

King Hardcore: This is where I buried my career way back when, and now it’s time to bring the violence back. What the hell are you going to do Chuck? Get your boyfriend Billy to help you? Or what’s his name? Brenton Cyrus? You two are as gay as Bobby Ocean was and you will suffer the same kind of beating I delivered to him. King Hardcore is back to whoop your ass first Chuck Matthews, then, I’ve got something else I want to deal with.

{{[[ King Hardcore grabs his Barbwire Baseball Bat and stares at it, studying the dents and dried up blood. Looking at the still very sharp edges. ]]}}

King Hardcore: The Asylum. I challenge Nightmare to a match at New Era and to make sure he doesn’t back down like a bitch, I’ll let him pick the stipulation. This is my world, I’m just letting you live in it.

{{[[ The camera zooms to the tombstone which read, “The Career of King Hardcore” “Until you are Born Again” “Rest in Peace” ]]}}